01 — Have you been in therapy before?

Trauma therapy may make sense for you at this time if you’ve been in therapy before. Typically, my clients have completed some other type of therapy (i.e. general talk therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Dialectical Behavior Therapy, EMDR, etc.) which gives them a basic therapy foundation with which to begin trauma work. This might look like having some basic coping skills, a sense of insight about yourself, or a few tools to regulate your emotions. You do not need to be an expert in regulating your emotions before beginning this work, however having some sense of how to do this (even if we don’t do a great job with it) is beneficial.

If you haven’t been in therapy before, it doesn’t automatically mean that trauma therapy may not be right for you at this time. It may be good to check in with yourself regarding the other items below as part of your assessment on whether you feel ready for this work. If you’re still unsure, you’re welcome to complete a screening form to see if it may be the right place and right time for you.

02 — Does your life feel generally stable in terms of housing, employment, relationships, etc., and do you feel like your basic physical needs are being met?

When we start trauma work, we want to be in a “good enough” stable place in our lives. When I say “good enough”, I mean that we’re able to function okay enough on a regular basis. We are never going to be in a perfect place where our life is completely calm and nothing is happening. However, doing trauma therapy while going through a really nasty divorce, immediately following the death of a loved one, while we’re living at an abusive parent's house, when we’re struggling to cope with day to day life, etc. may not be the most helpful treatment for us at that time. My goal as a trauma therapist is to help you feel better, not worse - and when we’re exploring the impact of past stuff on our present day life, it can add insult to injury if we’re already dealing with some pretty heavy stuff in the present day.

I explain it to my clients like this: if you were to come into the emergency room with a giant bleeding gash on your leg, you don’t want the ER doctor to focus on a toe that was broken years ago and healed the wrong way - you want them to fix the bleeding gash. In therapy, if we have a “bleeding gash” (aka present day issue(s) that are really bothersome for us), we want to address that first - which might look like taking some time to work with another therapist first before coming back to trauma work. Once we’ve got the source of the instability under control, then it may make sense to come back to trauma work. If you’re not sure if it’s the right time for you to do trauma work, you can fill out a screening form here.

03 — Are you seeking to understand how your past experiences have shaped who you are in the present?

In the model I use to help clients heal from childhood trauma, we explore how the past impacts the present. For example - if you had a ragey parent as a child, you may feel easily triggered by your own (or someone else’s) anger as an adult. If you were expected to handle things beyond your developmental level, you may struggle with easily feeling overwhelmed. If your parents always had to find someone to blame anytime something went wrong, you may find yourself assuming things are always your fault.

Our past experiences with caregivers can deeply shape who we are in the present - in everything from job and relationship choices to how we interact with other people. In this type of therapy, we are exploring those connections and unlearning, so that we can become more authentic to who we actually are without our trauma.

04 — Are you interested in learning about the intersection of how past experiences affect your relationship with food, exercise, and your body?

I see our work on our relationship with food, movement, and our body as a direct parallel of our trauma work on other areas of our life. For example, our relationship with our body can be directly impacted by the way our parents viewed their own bodies (or yours, or others). Parents or grandparents who engaged in chronic dieting can pass disordered eating habits on to their children (whether intentionally or unintentionally). Parents who force their kids to exercise to keep their body a certain size can result in feeling like we have to exercise to “earn” our food as adults. Even outside of our family, diet culture and fatphobia are rampant in our society, which makes it incredibly difficult for us to accept our bodies as they are, or to practice body neutrality. Disordered eating habits are normalized in our culture, and we’re taught that it’s okay or necessary to count or calories or weigh our food (trust me, I’ve been there myself!). We’re also taught from a young age to dislike and pick apart our bodies - it’s no wonder we can have such a contentious relationship with them!

That being said, we might be a good fit to work together if you’re also interested in exploring how trauma may have impacted your relationship with food, exercise, and your body. Read on for some signs that trauma could be impacting your relationship with food, movement, and your body.

When it comes to FOOD, you might…

• Struggle with knowing how much and what to eat, and often rely on someone or something else (like a diet program!) to tell you what to eat and when, instead of trusting your body’s internal cues

• Have previously dieted to lose weight

• Weigh, measure, or count the food you’re eating (or have in the past)

• Feel self conscious and worry about what others think about what food you’re eating, how much food you’re eating, etc.

• Feel “addicted” to certain types of food

• Struggle with “overeating” or “binging”

• Sometimes feel out of control around food

• Feel shame about the food you eat

• Classify foods as “good” or “bad”, “healthy” or “unhealthy”, etc.

• Try to control your body size through the amount of food you eat

When it comes to EXERCISE, you might…

• Feel like exercise is a forced chore, rather than something you enjoy doing

• Have a hard time taking days off from the gym

• Feel like you have to exercise to “earn” your food

• Use exercise as a way to avoid feeling your emotions

• Feel “addicted” to exercise

• Use exercise as a way to control your body size

When it comes to YOUR BODY, you might…

• Find yourself regularly having negative thoughts about your body

• Tend to pull at your clothes, suck in your stomach, or cover your body because you’re feeling insecure about it

• Frequently weigh yourself

• Experience distress about the number on the scale if it’s not what you want to see (or feel really good if it’s a number you’re happy with)

• Try to control your body size through food and movement

• Feel shame about your body/body size or weight (or have in the past)

• Feel really uncomfortable or distressed about wearing certain types of clothes where you can’t hide your body (i.e. shorts, bathing suits, tank tops, tighter clothing, etc.)

Keep in mind that you may notice some (or all) of these things in your own relationship with food, movement, and your body - or you may experience other things not on this list.

05 — Do you reside in North or South Carolina?

We may be a good fit if you currently reside in (or are in the processing of moving to) North or South Carolina. Due to licensing requirements, I am currently unable to see clients in other states; however, please continue to check back as I plan to expand the states where I’m licensed in the future.